Gender Swaying Anyone?

Has anyone ever heard of “gender swaying?” I was doing an internet search on healthy foods to eat while TTC (trying to conceive) and came across a couple different forums where people were talking about eating foods for gender swaying.


What is Gender Swaying you ask? From what I read, gender swaying is “implementing changes in your lifestyle, diet and TTC methods to increase your odds of conceiving a certain gender.”

For. Real.

I am not here to judge anyone- I actually think it’s really interesting and although I’m not all that convinced that it works the science that people put behind it is really fascinating. It also seems to be a hot button topic on some boards that I have seen (once I became curious and started doing an internet search on it). Some people get very up in arms it- almost to the point of being offended that it’s even being suggested. To that I say, to each their own. If you don’t like it – then don’t do it. I’m just looking for a healthy and happy baby myself.

So, anyway, if I understand it correctly, you can change your diet to a more alkalized (boy) or acidic (girl) to conceive a certain gender. I’ve also seen where some people say eating a lot of dairy – cheese, milk, and yogurt – and processed foods helps in “swaying” towards a girl. Eating more potassium – bananas and potatoes – and adding salt “sway” towards a boy. There are a bunch of food lists out there. I also saw that some people swear by having sex at different times of the day and at different times in your cycle will also impact the gender sway… a couple sites even suggested the pattern of the moon! It seems that most agree it mainly has a lot to do with the pH of your vag. One woman swore by drinking a concoction of baking soda and water a couple times a day and then sticking a finger full of baking soda up the “love canal” prior to having sex and that was how she had all boys.

Ok.

Once again, to each their own… but… no. There will be nothing that I use for baking cookies going up there.

I compared the two food lists and I pretty much eat a mainly a “boy” diet. I guess it’ll be interesting to see if our IVF is successful next month if we end up being blessed with a boy(s).

Work It Girl

**First, let me put in a little disclaimer that any product that I talk about on my blog I am not, in any way, compensated for.  I am just a suburban gal going through IVF who has a little blog hoping to help others with my experiences.

When I went through my first round of IVF I pretty much was a lump on a log.  They scared the crap out of me at the IVF informational seminar about being very careful with movement while on the stim meds.  Your ovaries get very big because of all of the follicles (where the eggs are) and there is a chance of them twisting (eek) if you do a lot of bouncy movement.  So no running/jogging, spinning, step aerobics… no running down the stairs… but you can walk. 

I was helping my mom go through some of her stuff (trying to consolidate and throw stuff away) and I found some old VHS tapes of Leslie Sansone and Florine Mark from 2000 called “In Home Walking.”

 

It got me thinking, this is something I can do during the IVF cycle.  So I brought it home and the next day got up an hour early to try them out.  Well… they’re hilarious.  I seriously think they did an SNL skit based off these tapes.  I was cracking up – the commentary is funny but then it’s almost awkward because you realize they are not trying to be funny.  But the walking itself was easy to do, you’re moving around and it’s a gradual workout – meaning you start off slow, pick up the pace and then go back down.  I will admit that my heart rate went up and I had a little sweat going on.  But I could not see myself doing these more than this one time (hey, at least I’m honest with myself!).

I then remembered that I had a friend years ago who lost a lot of weight with something called “Walk Off The Pounds.”  Low and behold… it’s my friend Leslie Sansone.  So I went onto Amazon and found some of her DVD’s (love love love Amazon, I have the Prime membership and if you’re an Amazon junkie like me, totally worth it).

These are the two that I bought.  Let me tell you, a vast improvement from the 2000 VHS!  I like them both for different reasons. 

The one on the bottom (Walk Away the Pounds, Ultimate Collection) came with a resistance band.  She incorporates it into the workouts, starting during the second mile.  It’s nice to have an arm workout in there.  As with the VHS tapes the people that are doing the workouts with her are ordinary people.  I am sure they are all actors but I mean there are people of all ages on there (young mother – grandmother).   Not model thin, not with every hair in place – they look like someone I might see at the grocery store.  Also, contrary to the misconception, you are not just marching in place.  My friend Danielle is convinced that it’s a DVD of just marching and won’t borrow it, haha.  It’s considered “low impact aerobics.”  It’s not complicated – I was a Zumba drop-out so if I can do this, anyone can!  I tried to take a couple Zumba classes, gave it the good ol’ college try, and was tripping over my own two feet and thanks to the large floor to ceiling mirrors; I could see that I looked like a complete moron while doing it.  Not sure how I look doing this but I’m in my own home so I don’t care!  It’s also something you can do in a limited amount of space, which I think is a plus.  The commentary is a little cheesy – not like the VHS tape but a little cheesy none the less.

The one on the top (Just Walk, Ultimate 5 Day Walk Plan) is the one I did this morning.  (I like to switch them up)  This one has a different group of exercises for each day of the week, for example:  Monday 2 mile walk with arm workout, Tuesday 3 mile walk with leg workout… I believe there is an ab workout, a total body stretch and something else…   Anyway, I really like this one because the moves are more like dancing – once again, Zumba drop out here so not that complicated to follow or really that advanced.  You don’t have to stick with segments either – for example today I did one day’s 3 mile walk and then another day’s arm workout.  What I do not like about this is that instead of everyday people there are 4 backup aerobics girls.  One of the girls particularly annoys me.  (Makes total sense that I’m annoyed by someone I don’t know in real life, right?  Of course it does.  Ha)  Carrie “the annoying one” does all these exaggerated movements and a lot of excessive nodding, always agreeing with everything that Leslie says.  LOL.  The commentary on this one is even more annoying so after I did the work out a couple times I now mute it and put on my own music. 

As much as the cheesy chit chat is annoying the workouts are good so it’s a good trade off.  Let me also say that I am not a work-out-aholic.  I was once-upon-a-time in very good shape, then I met my husband and wooed him with my fantastic cooking complete with cream sauces and full fat recipes… then got a job where I sit on my big butt all day in front of a computer… so now, not in the best of shape.  Hey, at least I’m honest about it!  So I feel like these workouts are better than nothing and something I can do in the comfort of my own home. 

I honestly think that I can modify them to be less bouncy and more “Giant Ovary” friendly but I’ll have to write that review when the time comes.  But I think this time around I am going to try and be a little more active than going the couch potato route – even if I’m gingerly marching-side-stepping-leg lifting-knee lifting in place.  J

Winter Summer Clothes Shuffle - part deux

It was a mere 5 months ago that I was talking about the big change over from Summer / Winter clothes… how every time I go through this I think, “next time I do this I will definitely be pregnant and have maternity clothes in the mix…”

So much has happened in that time frame, so much heart break.  I am now getting ready to change over my clothes and once again the same thoughts are rolling around in my head… I feel like I’m just setting myself up for another let down.  I’m really trying to not put all my eggs in one basket (no pun intended) with this upcoming IVF since it’s the last one our insurance covers.  I’m getting a little anxious and trying not to think about it but of course that’s easier said than done. 

I sat outside on my lunch today with M -she’s closing in on her final 4wks of pregnancy and can no longer walk on lunch because she gets out of breath and crampy.  While we were sitting there, 3 pregnant woman walked by and 2 of them I had not until that moment known were pregnant.  Ugh.  I just think I am having one of those days where everywhere I look there is another pregnant lady and I am just so envious…

I think I need to go home, sit on our deck with the hubster (and a big glass of wine) and relax…

to my sister...

I'm not sure if I mentioned this before, but my sister lives in Germany.  She's been in Europe for about 15 years and is married to a German man and they have beautiful little girl who is so darn cute.  I miss her terribly - it's hard to go through all this with her so far away (we're very close).  But she has her career (she's an opera singer) and her family / husbands family over there so I won't kid myself with the thought of her moving back to the U.S.  We talk on Skype when we can but with the 6 hour time difference we do a lot of communication over email.  I figured I would share part of my most recent email to her here...

As far as me... I'm ok because I have no other choice but to be ok.  I have to get out of bed, I have to go to work, I have to be present for the hubs.  Sometimes I forget that he is going through all this as well.  Sometimes I find myself on auto-pilot and I think that's ok because if I stop and completely think about what's going on and what can and cannot happen I will fall apart.  I am trying not to put all my eggs in one basket with our second round of IVF but unfortunately this is it.  We cannot afford to do it again.  I trust my doctor, he is a world renowned specialist and I can't afford to second guess him now.  Not only financially but for for my own mental health.  If I start to second guess him now I will lose it, haha.  I have to believe that this will work, I have to believe that God will bless us with a child.  I can't allow myself to believe otherwise even though sometimes I think I need to prepare myself for that just in case.  

We are officially starting our 2nd IVF and it's called a "Down Regulation" protocol and it is over the course of 2 cycles.  Tonight I start birth control- as crazy as that sounds.  My last 2 cycles were 23 days and then 45 days.  I believe the birth control is to get my cycle regular because on the 45 day cycle I didn't even ovulate (I had blood tests).  On April 28th I start an injectable medication called Lupron.  I'm not 100% sure what that does but I refuse to look it up on the internet because I believe the potential side effects and anything that it says it may cause will be scarier than not knowing.  Like I said, I have complete faith in my doctor.  He's been doing this for 30 years and his walls are covered with plaques and awards... anyway, I'm on the Lupron for 10-11 days, stopping whenever my period starts again.  Then I go in for the baseline ultrasound and blood work... that's when the big fun meds start, the ones that give me giant egg filled follicles and make my abdomen so distended I look, ironically, 4 months pregnant.  Haha.  I got all my meds in the mail on Friday - all $7,000 of them (which we only had to pay $20- thank goodness for insurance).  There is a lot of stuff, A LOT of stuff, that I am going to be injecting into my body.  In looking at all that I cannot believe that God will have us go through all this and not grant us this miracle.  

I have gained a lot of weight from all these hormones, that's something that has been terribly depressing but in the grand scheme of all this crappola that's on the back burner for now.  I have too much churning around in my brain to allow myself to ponder my fat ass anymore than I already do.  All I can do, for now, is eat as healthy as I can and exercise.  When June comes around and I know where I stand in this whole adventure (because by then I should know if it's a yes or a no) I can think about my big butt then.  

I know it's silly to say, "don't worry about me" because as my sissy of course you worry and I love you dearly for it.  I really wish you were here to hold my hand and to let me lean on you when I cry but you are here, in my heart.  I can hear you rooting for me from halfway around the globe.  I am, however, lucky to be blessed with the most amazing husband.  Honestly, not a day goes by that I do not thank my lucky stars for that man.  As crazy as all this has made me, I think I would be halfway to the loony bin if it wasn't for him.  He is what has been holding me together.  Yeah I have my bad days (which I think is to be expected) and he lets me be sad but he doesn't let me lose hope.  That's what I have to have - hope.

wrench in the plans

Well after 45 days and no ovulation dear Aunt Flow has decided to show her face.  Too bad that completely puts a wrench in the medication protocol that the doctor had wanted me on. 

How it was supposed to go is that I started Provera on Tuesday - take that for 10 days.  Then on Sunday 4/14 I would have started the Lupron injections for 10 - 11 days (still taking the Provera) until my period showed up.  Then I would go in for the baseline ultrasound and blood work... and then I don't know what meds I would have been starting next.

Wouldn't you know that AF decided to rear her ugly head on her own damn schedule?  This morning I went to the bathroom and was like, "what the what?!?"

The ironic thing is - now they are putting me on birth control.  Oh ok.  That makes sense... not.  But then again I am not the Fertility Specialist with a zillion awards and plaques on my wall... going to assume the man knows what he's doing, haha. 

No just kidding, I *think* it's to regulate my cycle since the last two were so wacky (23 days and then 45 days).  Then Lupron starts on 4/28 (overlapping the BCP).  After 10 days of Lupron AF should come again in all her glory and then I go in for the baseline...

Whew it’s all just the beginning…

The kicker is my cramps are so bad.  So. Bad.  Just to drive the point home of, "oh so you know for sure you are not pregnant."  Thanks so much!

I mentioned a while back that two couples in our circle of friends are both pregnant with their second child - and they got pregnant with their firsts after we started trying.  Once again, not bitter - so totally happy for them.  One thing for sure this journey has taught me is that every child is a miracle from God.  They were both, ironically, due on 4/10.  One couple had their little boy on Monday and I have been texting the other for the past couple days checking on her...

I know I just said that I wasn't bitter, and I really am not.  It's just something that I want so deeply - it almost feels like some secret club that I can't get a membership for.  I am of course being there and being supportive for my friends but then on the flip side I am so torn up inside because I desperately want to be pregnant and have a child(ren).

I just have to keep telling myself - it's not my turn yet but hopefully soon.

Please God.
Please.

Here we go again!

Good news is - the test results came back and everything looks great!  Hallelujah!  No real reason why we lost all 10 embryos but the good news is that it isn't something in our chromosomes or the hubs sperm that made it all go so terribly wrong.  The doctor is very confident that a different medication protocol is the way to go.  They nurse asked me when the first day of my last period was and I said... February 27th.

Yes you read that right that would make me CD42... yes I am still on the same cycle I posted about in the beginning of March when we went for our testing.  Of course I have already taken 3 pregnancy tests.  It is possible that a miracle could occur and I could actually get pregnant while waiting for the test results to come back... close friends of ours had that exact thing happen when they were getting their finances in order to start their first IVF. 

Blammo!  Pregnant!

But that was not the case for this uterus.  I went to get my blood drawn yesterday with a teeny tiny glimmer of hope that maybe just maybe...but no.  Actually I have not even ovulated yet.  Son-of-a-gun day 42 and haven't even ovulated yet. 

Gah.  Double Gah.

So, looking on the bright and shiny side, the nurse said that since I haven't ovulated yet and I am so far into this cycle we can start the IVF cycle.  Now.  Like, right now.

Hot Diggity Dog!

At least we don't have to wait.  I thought we were going to wait for me to get my period, and then wait until CD21 to start the Lupron.  But they started me on my first pill of Provera last night (to help me get my period).  I take that for 10 days but on day 6 (Sunday) I start the Lupron injections as well.  I do those every night until I get my period, more than likely 10-11 days after the first injection.  Then I go for blood work and ultrasound on CD2... I'm not sure yet which meds they are going to put me on but at one point but the nurse mentioned Menupur (probably spelt that wrong).  I was going to Google it to see what it was for but I think Googling any of these meds is a bad idea.  I know that the side effects are uber scary.  I am sure that one if not all can "cause cancer" (and seriously, what now a days doesn’t?).  I just can't deal with having that much information in my head. 

So here we go again friends... thank you so much for taking this journey with me.  Fingers, toes, and legs crossed that this is our miracle cycle and I will have a strong and sticky baby in my womb by June!

Also, thank you so much for your comments- it really means a lot to me to know that so many of you are rooting for us.  This is such an isolating thing and I sometimes forget that I am not alone.  There are so many women out there just like me going through this same thing... I pray we all get our miracles soon.

xo J.

"engorged blood vessel"

Yep you read that correctly. 

"Engorged blood vessel more than likely from the hormone medications."

I just came from the dermatologist.  I have this bump that appeared out of no where behind my ear.  At first I thought it was a pimple and I scratched at it... and it bled like a son-of-a-gun for 45 minutes.  Then, because of it's location I would catch it every time I tucked my hair behind my ear and would have blood pouring down my neck in 2 seconds.  Pretty gross.  I was so scared it was cancer.  Once again I went from zero to worst case scenario in no time flat. 

I had so much anxiety this afternoon on the way to the doctor.  Seriously I never had panic attacks and all these episodes of anxiety before all this trying to get pregnant stuff.

I sat on the table and apprehensivly moved my hair so he could get a better look... I held my breath waiting for him to say something indicating bad news (lol what a wacko, haha).  He just said, oh that's an engorged blood vessel and you have another little one right below it.

Ok first, ew.
Second, awesome <---- can you hear the sarcasm?

He asked the basic questions: when did it appear, has it changed in size... are you pregnant?

Ahh no.  Not knocked up. 

Of course I told him how I was seeing Dr. B over and the Fertility Center and that had I first noticed the bump 3 mos ago when I started the stronger hormone medication.  He said, that's it.  It's more than likely due to all the extra hormones in my body since I have never had anything like this happen before.  It has gotten a lot smaller this past month when I wasn't on the meds. He said that if it gets bigger when I start the medications again (when ever that may be) to call and I'll have to come in to get it removed.  He said that if I get pregnant it would just get bigger and bigger because, once again, of all the extra hormones.

Also did you catch where he said, "...and there's another little one right below it."? 

DOUBLE CRAP! 

More?  Seriously?  I could just start to get more of these gross, raised, dark red bumps?  AND not just behind my ears either folks, I could get them anywhere on my body.

This roller coaster ride of awesome-ness just gets better and better!  < insert sarcasm >

But of course it will all be worth it in the end if we get our miracle...